There are probably about as many answers to that question as there are individuals who ask it. For each of us, the answer differs.
Jeremiah 2:27b says, “They have turned their backs to me and not their faces yet when they are in trouble, they say, ‘Come and save us.’”
Imagine God sitting on His throne looking out at His bride (you), and what He sees is your back and not your face. Many, if not most women spend their entire Christian walk looking at the world to fill them rather than to God. I know I did and still do at times. There is a simple reason for this – we don’t believe Jesus is enough. Few would ever dare admit such a thing, but the truth is that most of us regularly have our eyes gazing toward the world and what it offers. Sure, we want Jesus, but we want Jesus plus. Jesus + our family. Jesus + the perfect life. Jesus + a successful career. Jesus + more of _______________. Only you can fill in this blank. You know what your + is.
If you had only Jesus, would that be enough? That’s a pretty frightening question. Don’t you secretly fear that if you say He’s enough then He might make you prove it and take away the rest? When He truly becomes enough, even that question will not have the power over you it once did.
It stands to reason that a face can only be pointing in one direction at one time. You are either looking at God or at the world. If you are looking back and forth, that will only serve to make you dizzy. No wonder the world is filled with confused Christians.
To what or who do you look to get your needs met?
Husband Children Home Career Social Media
Your Looks Education Parents Money Perfectionism
Other: __________
While this list is by no means exhaustive, it may serve to get your thoughts going. Here are a few applications of this principle: If your children behave well or are successful in school, you feel people will see you as a good mother (Good enough). If you have countless “friends” or “followers” on social media outlets, you feel liked (Good enough). If you do things perfectly, everyone will see you as someone who has it all together (Oops, good enough again). If you look thin/beautiful, once again, that makes you feel good enough.
Notice a theme? For women, ours is rarely a pursuit of power. Ours is typically a striving for acceptance and worth. We want to feel valuable. Instead of receiving our value from our position in Christ, which is fully accepted in the Beloved (Eph. 1:6 NKJV), we hope that somehow, someway, the things of this world will make us feel what we desperately need to feel, good enough or of value.
- To whom do you turn when things go wrong/right?
- Do your feelings rise and fall based on the opinion of others?
- If you had more money or possessions, do you think that would make you happier?
- Do you constantly want that “something” and then once you get it, find it was not quite as fulfilling as it promised to be – then you move on to the next thing?
The main question you need to answer is this: Is Jesus enough, or am I looking to other things or people to fulfill me? Spend time today pondering this question. If you need to, take a few days. Pray and ask Him to show you what you look to for fulfillment and happiness.